Energy Medicine DNA

Call your Psychic!

Resolving Conflict

by @candesscampbell

“Sure it hurts, but if you love someone, you forgive them.” Blanche “Some things you forgive, some things you never forgive.” Kate

– from Brighton Beach Memoirs by Neil  Simon

Our current planetary conflict is a great backdrop for me to expound on how to resolve conflict and the pitfalls of communication. With all the floods and fires on our coveted planet and in our politics, I thought this would be a timely topic.

Here are some helpful steps.

Clear with this person on an energetic level.

  1. Ground your energy. Here is a video that will teach you to do this. http://bit.ly/wBHJbh
  2. You have an aura around you which is part of your energetic self. Imagine pulling your aura in around your body. Pull it in about 6 – 8 inches around you.
  3. Focus in your heart and bring your attention out of the top of your head into the heavens.
  4. Image the person there with you. At this level, send them love from your heart. You may also imagine sending them golden white Light from your heart.
  5. If you can do this without anger or negative feelings, talk with them at this level.
  6. Come back down, image yourself filling up with golden white Light and release any leftover energy down your grounding cord.

Steps to resolve conflict in person.

  1. Write out the situation in your journal and then re-read it the next day. Sometimes it helps to do this a few times, so that you can become clear on what happened and what you want to communicate.

 

  1. Become aware of your own part of the situation, even if you perceive it to be minor in comparison to the other person.

 

  1. If you are angry, look at where you may be feeling hurt or fearful. These emotions are often right under the surface of anger. Feel your feeling and let them go. Journal them over and over if need be.

 

  1. Contact the person you are having conflict with and use clear, direct, honest communication. I suggest you meet in person (not via text or email) because this allows you not only to read the body language, but also to open your heart.

 

  1. Give the other person the chance to communicate their side completely. It is helpful to use the words, “I heard you say,” and repeat back to them what you heard and let them clarify. This helps them to feel heard. You can hear what someone is saying without agreeing with them. It is important that you hear.

 

  1. Once the other person feels heard, share your side. They may not listen well and you may not feel heard. If that is the case use the broken record method. Continue to say the core message again and again, “I hear what you say, and ______.” Yes, that is true, and _______.” Do this until they are able to understand they are not hearing you.

 

  1. Make a request of the person such as “My request is we put this behind us and go on from here,” or “My request is that we continue to meet and talk weekly until we can resolve this.” You can use whatever it is that you desire.

 

  1. Trust your intuition, and use as many of these steps as you would like. If the person is not willing to meet with you or clear the situation with you, then move on and let it go. No longer allow them into your energy field and set healthy boundaries.

 

Sometimes people have a hard time clearing conflict because of negative communication patterns. Often these reactions were learned in early childhood as a survival response to a dysfunctional family. In this case they may triangle in other people to take sides, or become passive aggressive and rather than talking with you directly, they will be passive in their aggression in a subversive manner.

More will be shared about this in this communication series.

One of the books I recommend for healthy communication is Nonviolent Communication: A Language of Life by Marshall B. Rosenberg

You can find other valuable information in my Self-Help Toolbox!

Share your own tools in resolving conflict in your life.

Save

Save

Save

The Vampire Archetype!

by @candesscampbell

The creativity of your subconscious mind not only shows up in dreams, but also shows up as archetypes in your life. Archetypes are overlying patterns that show up in all cultures that are seeded in the psyche. Some examples of archetypes are mother, judge, teacher and healer. When you begin to look at these patterns in your life, you can unleash your creative energy.

[clickToTweet tweet=”Who are the Vampires in your Life?” quote=”With Halloween around the corner and an expectation of ghosts and goblins knocking at my door – I thought this would be a great time to share about the Vampire Archetype!”]

Many cultures are intrigued and fascinated with vampires. Vampires were mythological figures that lived off the essence of others by drinking their blood.

pumpkinHonestly, they give me the creeps, but the adrenaline rush others get from the scariness of blood and gore may be part of the attraction. There is a seductive nature to the vampire as well.

A person with the Vampire Archetype tends to live off of the energy essence of others. Have you ever felt drained by someone you worked with, even if they didn’t talk much? Do you have people in your life that seem to steal your energy? Do you have friends that exhaust you just by being with them?

Maybe you have the Vampire Archetype. After spending time with someone, do you feel energized and then you notice they look like all the blood drained from their face. Do you find others avoid you? Do you come off as clingy or needy? Are you continually looking to others for validation or to make you feel better?

Historically, in many dramas, real or written, the Vampire Archetype has been featured in many male and female relationships. In these cases, there is eroticism between the vampire and his conquest. The female is repelled by the vampire, but also drawn into the sexual nature of the submissiveness. In this case, the male overpowers the female, taking her energy for himself. Today, this archetype may be underlying many domestic abuse situations.

[clickToTweet tweet=”A person with the Vampire Archetype tends to live off of the energy essence of others. ” quote=”A person with the Vampire Archetype tends to live off of the energy essence of others. “]

Currently, people are more aware of the energy around their body, of energy exchange, and how they feel when they are around others. A woman with a Vampire Archetype may come off as loving and helpful, but when she leaves, you may feel like she took a piece of you with her. She may continually ask you for more than you can give or do. She may complain constantly. Maybe you have had a relationship with a man and ended it and he won’t leave. He may continue to cling to you or even stalk you. The codependent relationship may fit into this category.

[clickToTweet tweet=”Do you have people in your life that seem to steal your energy?” quote=”Do you have people in your life that seem to steal your energy?”]

Rather than vampires looking gory and dressing in black and gray with blood dripping down, today they look like anyone else in your life. Much of my work for the last 25 years has been around energy and energy medicine. As an intuitive reader I look into the aura and the chakras of my clients and can see where they are losing power, where they are either giving their power away or being attacked.

scaryWhen someone attaches to you or hits you energetically, you are drained, depressed and sometimes somewhat paralyzed. When you are managing your own energy within yourself and not enmeshed with others, not trying to control others or attaching to others, you feel good!

Previously, I psychically read a woman who had been attacked by another woman who was envious of her. She experienced being hit energetically. When this happened, she felt slimed. As soon as she identified this feeling, I was able to look at her energetically and see who hit her and why. I cleared her energy field right away and put up protection so this could not continue to happen. The person who attacked her has the Vampire Archetype. With further investigation, I understood the language the attacker continually uses is one of lack. She has a scarcity perception. She attaches to others and attacks others, for their life force, rather than understanding that she can fill herself up from within. Instead of being grateful, she focuses on what others have, turns green with envy and becomes toxic. Instead of being full of self-love and loving others, she is continually full of judgment and fear. Although she presents herself as being knowledgeable, slyly her toxicity affects everyone around her.

What do you do if you have a person like this in your life? You can learn to ground yourself and run your own energy (earth and cosmic) and set up protection. I have many meditation tools and videos you can access to do this on my website. You can focus in your heart and bring your attention up out of your crown chakra at the top of your head. See the person there and for three seconds see them receiving a ball of golden white Light, of Love from the Universe. Then let them go. Do this as often as you need to release them from your thoughts. It will be up to the person as to whether they will receive this clearing or not. You though, have in part cleared yourself from their negativity and their energy.

What if you have the Vampire Archetype? You can balance yourself by giving to others without expectation. First, keep your energy clear with the same meditation tools and videos I mentioned above and allow yourself to receive in ways that give you a sense of personal power and self-worth. You can volunteer or help out those around you. Find a counselor or life coach to help you heal the past so that you can be healthy in the present.

If you’re not consciously aware of your energy and how the Vampire archetype is affecting you, you may notice the vampire showing up in your dreams. You may dream you have an encounter with a person or an entity that drains you. You may be paralyzed or even gorier, lose blood. Whether the vampire image in the dream is fictional or someone you know, the vampire sneaks up and suddenly has taken your life force.

Dreams can be scary even though they are coming as a message from your Higher Self. Taking time to work with dreams can be empowering and guide you to take action in your life. If you want to explore your dreams, the book I recommend is Realities of the Dreaming Mind: The Practice of Dream Yoga by Swami Sivananda Radha.

By understanding and working with the Vampire Archetype, you will learn to protect yourself, or if it is your archetype to heal yourself and access your natural path of health and move toward your Divine Soul purpose.

Here is your chance to leave feedback about your experiences of people who have shown up as Vampires in your life! I will be happy to share with you some tools to protect yourself from being attached and losing energy!

This article was previously posted in Live Encounters Magazine.

Resolving Conflict!

by @candesscampbell

Recently at Interplayers Theatre, I saw the play Brighton Beach Memoirs by Neil Simon. It was an incredible performance that exemplified the topic at hand – conflict.

The story is about Eugene, an adolescent, Jewish boy in 1937. He recalls his memories of living with his parents, aunt, two female cousins, and his brother at a time when he was going through puberty, sexual fantasy, poverty, and living in a crowed home. In this play, Eugene Jerome, played by Nich Witham, gave an over-exaggerated sense (in a fantastic performance) of not being heard and doing what he could to find his place and get his needs met in this family.

This play was a great backdrop for me to expound on how to resolve conflict and the pitfalls of communication. Here are some helpful steps.

 Clear with this person on an energetic level.

1. Ground your energy. Here is a video that will teach you to do this. http://bit.ly/wBHJbh

2. You have an aura around you which is part of your energetic self.  Imagine pulling your aura in around your body. Pull it in about 6 – 8 inches around you.

3. Focus in your heart and bring your attention out of the top of your head into the heavens.

4. Image the person there with you. At this level, send them love from your heart. You may also imagine sending them golden white Light from your heart.

5. If you can do this without anger or negative feelings, talk with them at this level.

6. Come back down, image yourself filling up with golden white Light and release any leftover energy down your grounding cord.

Steps to resolve conflict in person.

1. Write out the situation in your journal and then re-read it the next day. Sometimes it helps to do this a few times, so that you can become clear on what happened and what you want to communicate.

2. Become aware of your own part of the situation, even if you perceive it to be minor in comparison to the other person.

3. If you are angry, look at where you may be feeling hurt or fearful. These emotions are often right under the surface of anger. Feel your feeling and let them go. Journal them over and over if need be.

4. Contact the person you are having conflict with and use clear, direct, honest communication. I suggest you meet in person (not via text or email) because this allows you not only to read the body language, but also to open your heart.

5. Give the other person the chance to communicate their side completely. It is helpful to use the words, “I heard you say,” and repeat back to them what you heard and let them clarify. This helps them to feel heard. You can hear what someone is saying without agreeing with them. It is important that you hear.

6. Once the other person feels heard, share your side. They may not listen well and you may not feel heard. If that is the case use the broken record method. Continue to say the core message again and again, “I hear what you say, and ______.” Yes, that is true, and _______.” Do this until they are able to understand they are not hearing you.

7. Make a request of the person such as “My request is we put this behind us and go on from here,” or “My request is that we continue to meet and talk weekly until we can resolve this.” You can use whatever it is that you desire.

8. Trust your intuition, and use as many of these steps as you would like. If the person is not willing to meet with you or clear the situation with you, then move on and let it go. No longer allow them into your energy field and set healthy boundaries.  (I will share more about this in a future video and blog.)

Sometimes people have a hard time clearing conflict because of negative communication patterns.  Often these reactions were learned in early childhood as a survival response to a dysfunctional family. In this case they may triangle in other people to take sides, or become passive aggressive and rather than talking with you directly, they will be passive in their aggression in a subversive manner.

More will be shared about this in this relationship series.

One of the books I recommend for healthy communication is Nonviolent Communication: A Language of Life by Marshall B. Rosenberg

You can find other valuable information at http://candesscampbell.com/books/self-help-toolbox

Bless your heart,

Candess

 

 

Resolving Conflict!

by @candesscampbell

   Recently at Interplayers Theatre, I saw the play Brighton Beach Memoirs by Neil Simon. It was an incredible performance that exemplified the topic at hand – conflict.

   The story is about Eugene, an adolescent, Jewish boy in 1937. He recalls his memories of living with his parents, aunt, two female cousins, and his brother at a time when he was going through puberty, sexual fantasy, poverty, and living in a crowed home. In this play, Eugene Jerome, played by Nich Witham, gave an over-exaggerated sense (in a fantastic performance) of not being heard and doing what he could to find his place and get his needs met in this family.

   This play was a great backdrop for me to expound on how to resolve conflict and the pitfalls of communication. Here are some helpful steps.

Clear with this person on an energetic level.

1. Ground your energy. Here is a video that will teach you to do this. http://bit.ly/wBHJbh

2. You have an aura around you which is part of your energetic self.  Imagine pulling your aura in around your body. Pull it in about 6 – 8 inches around you.

3. Focus in your heart and bring your attention out of the top of your head into the heavens.

4. Image the person there with you. At this level, send them love from your heart. You may also imagine sending them golden white Light from your heart.

5. If you can do this without anger or negative feelings, talk with them at this level.

6. Come back down, image yourself filling up with golden white Light and release any leftover energy down your grounding cord.

Steps to resolve conflict in person.

1. Write out the situation in your journal and then re-read it the next day. Sometimes it helps to do this a few times, so that you can become clear on what happened and what you want to communicate.

2. Become aware of your own part of the situation, even if you perceive it to be minor in comparison to the other person.

3. If you are angry, look at where you may be feeling hurt or fearful. These emotions are often right under the surface of anger. Feel your feeling and let them go. Journal them over and over if need be.

4. Contact the person you are having conflict with and use clear, direct, honest communication. I suggest you meet in person (not via text or email) because this allows you not only to read the body language, but also to open your heart.

5. Give the other person the chance to communicate their side completely. It is helpful to use the words, “I heard you say,” and repeat back to them what you heard and let them clarify. This helps them to feel heard. You can hear what someone is saying without agreeing with them. It is important that you hear.

6. Once the other person feels heard, share your side. They may not listen well and you may not feel heard. If that is the case use the broken record method. Continue to say the core message again and again, “I hear what you say, and ______.” Yes, that is true, and _______.” Do this until they are able to understand they are not hearing you.

7. Make a request of the person such as “My request is we put this behind us and go on from here,” or “My request is that we continue to meet and talk weekly until we can resolve this.” You can use whatever it is that you desire.

8. Trust your intuition, and use as many of these steps as you would like. If the person is not willing to meet with you or clear the situation with you, then move on and let it go. No longer allow them into your energy field and set healthy boundaries.  (I will share more about this in a future video and blog.)

   Sometimes people have a hard time clearing conflict because of negative communication patterns.  Often these reactions were learned in early childhood as a survival response to a dysfunctional family. In this case they may triangle in other people to take sides, or become passive aggressive and rather than talking with you directly, they will be passive in their aggression in a subversive manner.

   More will be shared about this in this relationship series.

   One of the books I recommend for healthy communication is Nonviolent Communication: A Language of Life by Marshall B. Rosenberg

   You can find other valuable information at http://candesscampbell.com/books/self-help-toolbox

Bless your heart,

Candess

 

Resolving Conflict! was originally published on Energy Medicine DNA