Energy Medicine

The Dilettante (Amateur) Archetype

December 30, 2016 by @candesscampbell

Enjoy a guest blog from Cheyenne Mendel, Goddess extraordinaire!

“From a Latin root meaning “to delight in,” the Dilettante is a lover of the fine arts who never rises above the level of an amateur, and to whom the phrase “jack of all trades, master of none” applies. Although the word has the negative connotation of a dabbler who seeks only a cursory knowledge or experience, it never completely loses the sense of delighting in the arts. The Amateur, from the Latin root for “love,” has many of the same qualities of the Dilettante applied to the realm of sports or applied arts such as cooking and gardening. In many cases it’s better to be an inspired amateur than a grind-it-out professional. Like the survival archetypes, the Dilettante or Amateur can alert you when you are in danger of becoming merely superficial in your pursuits, or losing the love that drew you to your avocation in the first place. The shadow Dilettante manifests as a pretension to much deeper knowledge than you actually possess.” – Caroline Myss

If you have not blessed yourself with any of Caroline Myss’s books or teachings I highly recommend it. They are life changing.

“VENICE” by Rowan Lyford

I realize now the archetype of the Dilettante came to me early 2016 when I went into the local artisans gallery in Crestone, Colorado. I saw this painting entitled “VENICE” and was immediately smitten. I love art but I have never considered myself an artist of any kind.

I could not get the painting out of my mind and would walk by to make sure it was still there. I realized I had to secure it for myself and plopped $700 down on it. I had never really purchased a painting let alone spend that kind of money.

I discovered it was painted by a 17-year-old girl named Rowan. I was amazed by how much it inspired me and it also turned out to be a feng shui cure to help sell my business.

In 2016 I took up piano lessons. I had them in the 2nd and 3rd grade but during the times I was supposed to be practicing, bad things were happening to me at home. I had “collapsed” (a Landmark Education term) the abuse with playing the piano. I never touched the piano again for decades.

Cheyenne Mendel playing the piano in her home in Saguache, Colorado.

I myself have been and acupuncturist for 26 years. I have had the privilege of treating over 30,000 sessions and chances are for years and years I have spent most of my days standing with people and working on them. Like me, there are many other specialist in fields that require tons of education like physicians for example, who have not explored the Dilettante simply for lack of time.

I would say anyone who spends 10,000 hours let alone 30,000 would be an expert in that field. I am not used to being an amateur. Crawling when I am used to running doesn’t feel great. Ego crushing at times!

The benefits of artistic expression are numerous and undeniable when practiced. Being able to do something for the sheer joy of it is inspirational and miraculous.

Another bucket list item for me was dance. Just this month, I enrolled in a studio for a 6 week two-step country swing class and it has been pure pleasure. For me the best part is “being led”. I have to lead in so many other areas of my life. To be able to let go and flit around the dance floor to honkey tonk music has been a blast.

In the Dec 2016/ Jan 2017 Reader’s Digest article, Kurt Vonnegut writes, ‘What I have to say to you, moreover will not take long, to wit: Practice any art – music, singing, dancing, acting, drawing, painting, sculpting, poetry, fiction, essays, reportage – no matter how well or badly, not to get money or fame, but to experience becoming, to find out what is inside of you, to make your soul grow.”

He goes on to say “Write a poem and make it the best you possible can. Don’t tell anyone what you are doing. Don’t share it with anyone. Tear it into tiny pieces and discard them widely in different receptacles.”

The Dilettante experiences art for the joy of it. The huge popularity of the show THE VOICE speaks to how much the population is thirsty for pure inspiration and joy in artistry.

The artist Prince died April 21, 2016. I cried for three weeks and then again even months later. Why? I never understood the crying I saw around me when Elvis died. I was 9 years old. All these people did not know Elvis. I now understand. I did not know Prince personally nor did I ever attend one of the famous Paisley Park pop up concerts, but the love and artistry and high frequency and how he conducted his life, left a big impression in my heart. Every time someone we know or someone who touches us dies, we take inventory of our life and the meaning of it and what brings meaning to it.

So if the Dilettante is knocking I recommend letting him or her in. The water is very fine.

“You’ve gotta dance like there’s nobody watching, Love like you’ll never be hurt, Sing like there’s nobody listening, and live like it’s heaven on earth.” – William W. Purkey

Cheyenne Mendel practices acupuncture in Crestone, Colorado.

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The Vampire Archetype!

October 19, 2016 by @candesscampbell

The creativity of your subconscious mind not only shows up in dreams, but also shows up as archetypes in your life. Archetypes are overlying patterns that show up in all cultures that are seeded in the psyche. Some examples of archetypes are mother, judge, teacher and healer. When you begin to look at these patterns in your life, you can unleash your creative energy.

[clickToTweet tweet=”Who are the Vampires in your Life?” quote=”With Halloween around the corner and an expectation of ghosts and goblins knocking at my door – I thought this would be a great time to share about the Vampire Archetype!”]

Many cultures are intrigued and fascinated with vampires. Vampires were mythological figures that lived off the essence of others by drinking their blood.

Honestly, they give me the creeps, but the adrenaline rush others get from the scariness of blood and gore may be part of the attraction. There is a seductive nature to the vampire as well.

A person with the Vampire Archetype tends to live off of the energy essence of others. Have you ever felt drained by someone you worked with, even if they didn’t talk much? Do you have people in your life that seem to steal your energy? Do you have friends that exhaust you just by being with them?

Maybe you have the Vampire Archetype. After spending time with someone, do you feel energized and then you notice they look like all the blood drained from their face. Do you find others avoid you? Do you come off as clingy or needy? Are you continually looking to others for validation or to make you feel better?

Historically, in many dramas, real or written, the Vampire Archetype has been featured in many male and female relationships. In these cases, there is eroticism between the vampire and his conquest. The female is repelled by the vampire, but also drawn into the sexual nature of the submissiveness. In this case, the male overpowers the female, taking her energy for himself. Today, this archetype may be underlying many domestic abuse situations.

[clickToTweet tweet=”A person with the Vampire Archetype tends to live off of the energy essence of others. ” quote=”A person with the Vampire Archetype tends to live off of the energy essence of others. “]

Currently, people are more aware of the energy around their body, of energy exchange, and how they feel when they are around others. A woman with a Vampire Archetype may come off as loving and helpful, but when she leaves, you may feel like she took a piece of you with her. She may continually ask you for more than you can give or do. She may complain constantly. Maybe you have had a relationship with a man and ended it and he won’t leave. He may continue to cling to you or even stalk you. The codependent relationship may fit into this category.

[clickToTweet tweet=”Do you have people in your life that seem to steal your energy?” quote=”Do you have people in your life that seem to steal your energy?”]

Rather than vampires looking gory and dressing in black and gray with blood dripping down, today they look like anyone else in your life. Much of my work for the last 25 years has been around energy and energy medicine. As an intuitive reader I look into the aura and the chakras of my clients and can see where they are losing power, where they are either giving their power away or being attacked.

When someone attaches to you or hits you energetically, you are drained, depressed and sometimes somewhat paralyzed. When you are managing your own energy within yourself and not enmeshed with others, not trying to control others or attaching to others, you feel good!

Previously, I psychically read a woman who had been attacked by another woman who was envious of her. She experienced being hit energetically. When this happened, she felt slimed. As soon as she identified this feeling, I was able to look at her energetically and see who hit her and why. I cleared her energy field right away and put up protection so this could not continue to happen. The person who attacked her has the Vampire Archetype. With further investigation, I understood the language the attacker continually uses is one of lack. She has a scarcity perception. She attaches to others and attacks others, for their life force, rather than understanding that she can fill herself up from within. Instead of being grateful, she focuses on what others have, turns green with envy and becomes toxic. Instead of being full of self-love and loving others, she is continually full of judgment and fear. Although she presents herself as being knowledgeable, slyly her toxicity affects everyone around her.

What do you do if you have a person like this in your life? You can learn to ground yourself and run your own energy (earth and cosmic) and set up protection. I have many meditation tools and videos you can access to do this on my website. You can focus in your heart and bring your attention up out of your crown chakra at the top of your head. See the person there and for three seconds see them receiving a ball of golden white Light, of Love from the Universe. Then let them go. Do this as often as you need to release them from your thoughts. It will be up to the person as to whether they will receive this clearing or not. You though, have in part cleared yourself from their negativity and their energy.

What if you have the Vampire Archetype? You can balance yourself by giving to others without expectation. First, keep your energy clear with the same meditation tools and videos I mentioned above and allow yourself to receive in ways that give you a sense of personal power and self-worth. You can volunteer or help out those around you. Find a counselor or life coach to help you heal the past so that you can be healthy in the present.

If you’re not consciously aware of your energy and how the Vampire archetype is affecting you, you may notice the vampire showing up in your dreams. You may dream you have an encounter with a person or an entity that drains you. You may be paralyzed or even gorier, lose blood. Whether the vampire image in the dream is fictional or someone you know, the vampire sneaks up and suddenly has taken your life force.

Dreams can be scary even though they are coming as a message from your Higher Self. Taking time to work with dreams can be empowering and guide you to take action in your life. If you want to explore your dreams, the book I recommend is Realities of the Dreaming Mind: The Practice of Dream Yoga by Swami Sivananda Radha.

By understanding and working with the Vampire Archetype, you will learn to protect yourself, or if it is your archetype to heal yourself and access your natural path of health and move toward your Divine Soul purpose.

Here is your chance to leave feedback about your experiences of people who have shown up as Vampires in your life! I will be happy to share with you some tools to protect yourself from being attached and losing energy!

This article was previously posted in Live Encounters Magazine.

Is Trump a Sex Addict?

October 12, 2016 by @candesscampbell

However you lean politically, the media is clearly bringing to the surface an issue that affects a large population in our country – Sex Addiction!

CNN, Fox News, MSNBC and others are all playing over and over the Access Hollywood video by Billy Bush where Trump showed his cards in how he thinks about and treats women.

With the accessibility of stimulation through the Internet and mobile phones, sexual addiction has come to the forefront. Celebrities behaviors are also being recorded and shared in public. In my private practice as a mental health and addictions counselor, more and more clients are showing up who need help from this addiction. Whether it be prostitution, pornography or chronic masturbation, it can wreak havoc in their lives and the lives of those they love. In response to this, the treatment community has begun to use sexual addiction assessments along with alcohol and drug assessments.

Working as a chemical dependency counselor at a Federal prison camp in the mid-1990s, during the “war on drugs,” we began assessing for childhood sexual abuse and past sexual abuse. Nearly all of the female clients had been sexually abused. Some of the men said yes, but I suspect even with the promise of confidentially, they did not admit to this. Many who have been abused don’t remember, but issues show up later in their lives in relationship.

Most of my clients who were diagnosed as sex addicts had been women and men who had a history of past sexual abuse and at some level attempted to find balance and healing, but instead found themselves in relationships where they became sexually addicted and often exploited. Some went on to be sex offenders. One example is a past client I counseled. He had been abused by his older brother and then went on to sexually abuse his nephew.

A leader in the field of Sexual Addition treatment is Douglas Weiss, PhD. This article summarizes the 6 Types of Sexual Addicts, a model he developed, which became the standard used to certify Sexual Recovery Therapists by the American Association for Sex Addiction Therapy.

[clickToTweet tweet=”‘In a normal situation, a person is having sex inside a relationship context.'” quote=”Weiss explains, “in a normal situation, a person is having sex inside a relationship context. He/she is gluing to the person, the eyes, and the soul of the person he/she is being sexual with.” This is different than having the object of sexual fulfillment being images that do not respond. Addiction creates lack of control, shame, and self-loathing and destroys relationships. “]

Six Types of Sexual Addicts

1. Biological Sexual Addict

Weiss states this is the most common sex addict. Basically the behavior is “ring the bell, feed the dog, ring the bell, feed the dog” like Pavlov’s conditioning. What happens is during orgasm; the endorphins that are released create an attachment to what is happening at the time. So whether this is a real or imaged person, the chemical release in the brain creates a bond. These endorphins, “almost four times as strong as morphine,” are the highest chemical reward the brain can come by, legally. Therefore, “your brain literally glues to, hungers for, craves, and wants to repeat that activity again.”

Weiss states that the Biological Sex Addict probably represents less than 15% of all sexual addicts, and is the baseline of all the sexual addictions. Most also have components of the other five types.

In my own counseling practice, many of my female clients who have a history of sexual abuse fall for his type of addict. They become the sexual object for them.

2. Psychological Sexual Addict

This person is often the one who has experienced emotional or physical abuse in his life. Due to the lack of love, touch, or security, as a child he sets up a fantasy life. This sense of neglect can carry on into adulthood and when his needs are not met at home, he creates a fantasy world where he feels adored, worshiped, and desired. This is the man who fantasizes he is the best, the biggest, the greatest, etc. If he has been dominated in his life he may fantasize as being the one who is dominating.

In his psychological fantasy, he feels sexually powerful, loved and wanted. In his imagination, he doesn’t have to deal with real women who may say no, ask him for commitment, ask for help with the housework or ask for emotional intimacy. Once this fantasy is paired with the powerful chemical endorphins, he is hooked.

3. Spiritual Based Sexual Addict

Similar to the psychological sexual addict, this addict is looking for a connection. There is a strong desire for a spiritual connection. They look to find it within their sexual addiction. In this case, once they have a spiritual experience through a religious encounter, an experience with Jesus or another guide or Guru, the sexual addiction stops. “Their sexual addiction just plain stops, because that’s where the origin of the ache or the need was for the individual.” These people rarely get help within the clinical community.

4. Trauma Based Sexual Addict

The trauma based sexual addict is the client I have most experience with. In this case, he or she has experienced sexual trauma, most likely as a child or adolescent. These clients go on to mirror their trauma in their relationships. For example a young girl who was sexually abused by an older uncle may end up in relationship after relationship with older men. She may despise herself for this, but continue the behavior and recreate the shame. A woman who has been physically abused in conjunction with a sexual trauma may act out being abused in the sexual act in order to be satisfied and make attempt after attempt to find the right partner, shaming herself all the way. She becomes a sexual addict that is also the sexual object of another addict.

5. Intimacy Anorexic

Although a separate issue from sexual addiction, Weiss states intimacy anorexia affects around 29% of sex addicts. Generally, the anorexic behavior is related to “sex addiction, sexual trauma, neglect in the family and cross gender attachment disorder.” There also may be related to other co-occurring disorders. Weiss describes intimacy anorexia as when a “spouse intentionally withholds emotional, spiritual and sexual intimacy.” They may control through silence, anger, or withholding money. They blame their spouse, withhold love, tend to be critical, and are unwilling to talk about their feelings. This is a difficult situation for the addict because as they are working on their own recovery, whether it be abstaining from prostitutes, masturbation, or pornography, they also need to learn to move toward their spouse or partner and re-create a healthy relationship. They have to learn to feel and communicate their feelings.

6. Mood Disorder

Sexual addicts who also have a mood disorder are another type of sex addict. Weiss shared about clients who were bipolar or had cyclothymic disorder and were medicating the imbalance neurologically through the ejaculation response. Until the medication was adjusted properly, they continued to relapse.

When you hear the term sexual addict, it may conjure up an image of someone being sexual, playful and having fun. The truth is the very opposite. Although the sexual thoughts and behavior may start that way, as in any addiction, the person loses control and their life spirals downward. Sexual addicts generally have low self-esteem and believe no one will love them as they are. They lack emotional intimacy and are continually pre-occupied with sex and sexual fantasies. They feel out of control and experience mood swings. They are filled with feelings of guilt and shame.

You may wonder, how sexual addiction is different from normal sexual behavior.

Weiss explains, “in a normal situation, a person is having sex inside a relationship context. He/she is gluing to the person, the eyes, and the soul of the person he/she is being sexual with.” This is different than having the object of sexual fulfillment being images that do not respond. Addiction creates lack of control, shame, and self-loathing and destroys relationships.

As with all addictions, recovery is a one-day at a time process. Interventions and treatment planning is different for each specific person. Most often when one is treated for sexual addition, the chances of recovery are better when their spouse or partner is involved.

In addition to treatment centers like the Heart to Heart Counseling Center in Colorado Springs, Colorado, where Dr. Weiss is the Executive Director, there are also 12 Step Programs such as Sex Addicts Anonymous. https://saa-recovery.org/ There are several other similar programs that provide help.

The Six Types of Sexual Addicts information came from a written interview of Dr. Weiss by Barbara Alexander and my email communication with him.

Douglas Weiss, Ph.D., is the Executive Director of Heart to Heart Counseling Center and the author of The Final Freedom: Pioneering Sexual Addiction Recovery (Discovery Press, 2008).

This article was published in part earlier in Live Encounters Magazine. http://liveencounters.net/january-2014/06-june-2014/dr-candess-m-campbell-sexual-addiction/

Live Intuitively: Journal the Wisdom of your Soul!

August 25, 2016 by @candesscampbell

Live Intuitively: Journal the Wisdom of your Soul!

You can also find this book on Amazon internationally!

Over the last 30 years as I sat with clients who were leaving a marriage or a job or bought a house they didn’t like, I would ask them, “When did you know this was the wrong man for you? Job for you? House that you didn’t like?” They often answered “When I first met him, at the job interview, or I knew it was not my heart house when I looked at it.” Nevertheless, they made decsions that were against their own intuitive nature.

That prompted me to write Live Intuitively: Journal the Wisdom of your Soul. This book guides you in activating your intuition through a journal process called “Soul Stems.”

In this process you will create a deeper relationship with yourself and no longer be reaching outside yourself for something that you can only find within.

For more than 30 years Candess M. Campbell, PhD has been journaling and guiding others in the writing process. She has been teaching intuition for over 20 years and assisting others to gain their own inner wisdom to make right choices the first time and live a life of abundance, happiness and joy.

With Live Intuitively: Journal the Wisdom of your Soul you will:

Activate your intuitive ability and read your energy field
Learn a powerful journaling tool to guide your daily decisions
Access your chakra information to clear and balance
Explore and understand your life purpose
Explore your beliefs and values to shape your life
Use your own power to heal your body, mind, and emotions
Purposefully create your future
Learn to facilitate your own Living Intuitively group!

[clickToTweet tweet=”You too can access your Intuitive information and make life enhancing decisions!” quote=”You too can access your Intuitive information and make life enhancing decisions!”]

Candess M. Campbell, PhD is available to guide your group through this intuitive writing process and included in Live Intuitively: Journal the Wisdom of your Soul is a guide for you to create your own Intuitive Journal Writing group. You can contact her online for individual intuitive readings.

Listen to your Gut!

July 26, 2016 by @candesscampbell

Confused about listening to your gut? Developing your intuition is simple, but takes practice. Here is an example that will help you.

In the Mirror of Others!

June 26, 2016 by @candesscampbell

I was having a discussion with a friend tonight about my beliefs and Christianity. It was great to share with each other about how she experiences Jesus and my relationship with Jesus. She was curious about my beliefs and I asked if she had read my blog about my trip to India and she hadn’t. I didn’t realize I had first published it in 2011, so I am re-posting to share with her and you!

I realized that the first few days of my trip to India were to be about learning to listen to my intuition. One of the experiences where I didn’t listen to this gentle inner voice was at the train station in Mumbai.

On the platform a young crippled man came up to me. He was scooting himself across the dirty cement of the station with his hands. His feet were twisted, and he appeared to be sitting with his legs curled up to his body. I reached into my purse to give him some coins. My intuition said to give him 500 rupees, but I thought my travel mates would say no so I didn’t. When I gave him a few rupees from my purse, his eyes and mine met, and there was an incredible light in his eyes. I felt like I had touched a power source with jolts of electricity running through me. A few minutes later he crossed my path again, and when our eyes met, we smiled, connected and waved. The feeling was so intense, that even days later, as I write this, my eyes are tearing. When I went to our train compartment I shared my experience with my Indian friend. He said, “This is the first of many you will meet. That is why you were so touched.” I explained to him that I agreed I would meet many, but that this one was different. My intuitive self knew he was an enlightened being. My friend asked, “Then why would this man have that kind of body?”

I entered trance and began to share the information I received. I understood that we are not our body. This physically crippled man had transcended his body. The reason he took on this body is that he came to the earth this incarnation to be a Light and to mirror to others. Everyone who looks at him will see him differently. Some may experience anger, sadness, judgment or joy. What I saw was an enlightened being! He was mirroring to us what we needed to see in ourselves at that time. I needed to see an enlightened being in a form that I did not expect. Another time I may experience him differently.

If this experience was all that happened to me spiritually on this trip to India, it would have been enough. This incredible being gave me a healing I will remember forever.

As the trip continued, I realized an important recurring theme was: We are all connected, and we gift each other. In this case, I gave him rupees, and I saw who he actually was. He gave me an incredible spiritual activation and awareness of myself, an understanding of what my life is about at this moment.

We can look at others in our lives and experience the healing of being mirrored by them. This is the sacredness of relationship. Whatever it is you are seeing in your life, take time to see it symbolically.

Recently, I was sitting on my patio reading a novel. Suddenly, I saw a spider on my knee, right there as if it was looking at me. I am not extremely frightened of spiders, but I jumped up: “Aahhh!!!” and knocked it off my leg. Then I asked myself, “What message did this little creature have for me?” In answer, I quickly saw a spider web holding all the projects I have in play right now. I saw myself spinning my own web. Then I saw the spider in the corner of the web resting. I realized I need to sit in the corner of my web at times and rest. Later, when I was sharing this story with a friend of mine who teaches dream interpretation and who I knew would understand the symbolism, I also realized my reaction to all my projects, was: “Aahhh!!!” I laughed at myself. I loved the mirroring gift from this spider.

Whether you are traveling the trains in India, sitting on your patio in your back yard or sharing with a friend, the gift of seeing yourself in the mirror of others is available to you daily. What a gift to expand the awareness of the magnificent being that you are! What a gift to shine your light as you remove the veils and stand in your Light!

Since I wrote this, I read the book The Yoga of Max’s Discontent by Karan Bajaj. If you enjoyed this story and have not read his book, I highly recommend it. His teaching about yogis transcended anything I understood before and expanded my mind and I will be forever grateful.

“A sickly body does not indicate that a guru is not in touch with divine powers, any more than lifelong health necessarily indicates an inner illumination.”

Autobiography of a Yogi – Paramhansa Yogananda