inspirational-life

Collaboration has been my word for 2015 and I have been practicing creating projects with others. I find that my style of communication is direct and my perfectionism is showing up. I am highly detailed oriented and highly present (partially my training as a counselor) and this year I am realizing that where others see a pine tree, I see each needle and pine cone.

My Soul Group is reading The Diamond Cutter: The Buddha on Managing your Business and your Life. In Chapter 7 the authors give 47 business problems and their solutions. The solutions are always an “imprint” that the business owner has that creates this problem. This belief is in alignment with what I hold to be true. What is happening in our lives is a reflection of ourselves.

One of the shorter examples from the book I can share (its more extensive in the book) is “Business problem #34. People around you are unreliable. You give them a job, and you’re never quite sure if they’re going to come through for you. The Solution here is . . . “the main actions you can take to assure yourself the perception (and therefore the reality) of reliability in the staff around you is for you to be constant and dependable in a very specific context: in your marriage or similar family commitments. It’s not fashionable nowadays to talk much about this kind of reliability, but according to the law of the potential in things and the imprints of our actions, this is one of the most important steps we can take in assuring stability in our personal and business lives.”

This book is really helping me practice what I believe. There is so much blaming of others, but the greatest changes come from making changes in myself.

What changes do you need to make in your own life to attract what you desire?

The Diamond Cutter: The Buddha on Managing your Business and your Life

“You can talk with someone for years, everyday, and still, it won’t mean as much as what you can have when you sit in front of someone, not saying a word, yet you feel that person with your heart, you feel like you have known the person for forever…. connections are made with the heart, not the tongue.”
― C. JoyBell C.

Soon after I chose my word for 2014 – Relationships – came the resistance. I am beginning to think that resistance may be the shadow side to most of what I want to manifest.

When I teach manifesting, I have my students or clients think about and write down specifically what they want to manifest. As soon as they do this, I encourage them to then write down all the thoughts of why they can’t have this. Now, this may appear counter-productive, but the reality is, these thoughts are going to either surface consciously or subconsciously and it is better to challenge them outright.

So I’ll use my word – relationships. I have made a decision to focus on relationships this year. The thoughts that surface are these:I’ll have to slow down and make time for other people.

1. I will get hurt.
2. People will want more of me than I can give.
3. I’ll have to be present to everyone who comes into my life and I’ll get exhausted.

Now, that I have identified the immediate concerns I have, I can challenge them.

1. I’ll have to slow down and make time for other people. – In this case, yes, I will do this. I have wanted to do this for a while and I can schedule my life with more play and less work and if I don’t resist this (stress and exhaustion) then I will really enjoy playing and being more present to friends and family.

2. I will get hurt. – Just because I am spending more time in my relationships and possibly allowing an intimate relationship, I don’t have to get hurt. I can move slowly, set necessary boundaries until I am confident and feel safe. I have a lot of skills and can use them in relationship. (You will notice that my resistance here appears to come from a need to feel safe.)

3. People will want more of me than I can give. – In this situation, the fear is not related to my friends and family, but more to other people. It will be necessary for me to be discerning of where I put my time and energy. It is not like a dam breaking. I can spend time with my friends and family without opening the floodgates to everyone. (overwhelm)

4. I will have to be present to everyone who comes into my life and I will become exhausted. – In this case, becoming present is actually a way of being less exhausted. There will be people around me that I don’t have to be continually present with. I can be present with myself and focus my attention where I would like. I am in control. (exhaustion)

I hope this example demonstrates the fears that come right behind your decision to manifest. Now, you can be conscious of the fears and challenge them. The theme of this 30-day blog, is not just relationship to others, but relationship to yourself.

You are in control of your life, your choices and your future!