Intuitive – Page 5

Marriage – Arranged or Falling in Love?

April 12, 2014 by @candesscampbell

“Our matriarchs had an interesting advantage over today’s western women. Matriarchs didn’t begin their marriage with love. Instead, they were taught how to love. They entered marriage with an earnest determination to grow a love that would sustain their marriage for a lifetime.”

― Michael Ben Zehabe, Song of Songs the book for daughters

When an invitation came from a friend of mine to attend his nephew’s wedding in Calcutta, I jumped at the chance. My flight took me from Spokane to Seattle, to Dubai and to Calcutta. What I didn’t know was how much I didn’t know about Hindu weddings.

My friend’s sister, the groom’s mother, picked us up after sunset to take us shopping in preparation for the ceremonies. While my friend sat upfront with the driver, I sat in the back of the relatively new car with his sister. Driver or taxi, it didn’t matter. The streets were full of a cacophony of honking and shouting as we maneuvered around other cars, taxis, motorized rickshaws and cycle rickshaws. Narrowly making it through the pedestrians, motorcycles, bikes and street dogs, I carefully listened to her as she shared it all.

She said that her son was marrying and it was an arranged marriage. She explained that what happens in an arranged marriage is the family signs up on a marriage portal to find a suitable partner for their daughter or son. This is the process she went through for her son, although it may be different in other arranged marriages. Questionnaires were completed online to make the correct match and then profiles of several choices for a possible mate were delivered. In this case, the groom was able to see the profiles and make some choices. The groom’s parents also ordered astrological charts so the astrologer could find who would be harmonious with their son. The parents then met with the young woman. Afterward, they invited the family and the young woman to meet their son. If there was a harmonious connection, the young couple met a few more times to test the compatibility. The next step was planning the marriage.

Some would scoff at this process and have many reasons to argue against it, saying it wouldn’t work; but statistics say different. According to UNICEF http://www.statisticbrain.com/arranged-marriage-statistics/ (August 16, 2012) the Divorce Rate for Arranged Marriages in India is 1.1 %. The Global Divorce rate for Arranged Marriages is 4 %.

So, could it be that arranged marriage is a more sensible way to pair up for life? What about falling in love? As I listened to the way the couples were paired, it sounded a lot like dating sites to me. Some of the largest dating sites in the US are match.com and eharmony.com. There is a difference though between dating sites and marriage portals. Many people I have talked with and my own experience is that many profiles on the dating sites are either false or exaggerated. In the US, there is even a TV show about this called Catfish. http://www.mtv.com/shows/catfish/

The screening process for marriage portals is much more complex and those who put up their profile are looking for marriage, not someone to date or with whom to create a sexual relationship. Although I’m not privy to any, there may be dating sites that are reliable and you can trust that the profile is accurate and meeting the person is safe. Agencies that are set up to match couples may be a better choice.

There are many ways of dividing relationships into stages. Here I will use the stages I use when counseling couples. They are the honeymoon phase, the working phase and the commitment phase.

With the “falling in love” process, there are stages that may differ from an arranged marriage. This is of course a simplified process, but falling in love begins with the honeymoon phase. You meet someone and you are immediately infatuated with them. You cannot stop thinking about them, love everything about them and find yourself smiling out loud and then embarrassed because you realize you are in public and think others can read your mind. During this stage, your energy increases and you become aroused, and even obsessed with the person to the point your friends get tired of listening to your ravings about him or her.

The next stage of the relationship is the working stage. You begin to notice some things you never observed before or what you did see begins to bother you. Previously, the fact he leaves his clothes all around the room was cute and showed his carefree attitude. Now, it’s irritating that you have to pick up after him. When she used to leave the sink full of toothpaste, it was childlike and playful. Now it is sticky and messy when you are in a hurry to shave and get to work.

This stage is when couples either learn to communicate and work together at being harmonious, or issues begin to tear at the thread of the relationship. The fun, playful guy begins to look like a slob and you wonder what you ever saw in him. The woman you felt proud to share with your friends, all of the sudden becomes controlling and whiny and you can’t wait to get away from her and do something with the guys.

These changes give you the opportunity to either end the relationship or learn to communicate, accept each other and go onto the next stage.

The next stage of relationship is a deepening process and you enter into the commitment stage. For many years I have said that when you enter into relationship, it brings up in your personality, all that needs healing and gives you the opportunity for personal growth. This is the gift of relationship. It is also a reason to do your personal development work before you get into relationship. You will attract a person at a similar level or vibrational frequency as you.

At this stage, you begin to understand how to communicate, be compassionate, compromise and stay connected. Even when you feel like responding with “fight or flight,” you stay and work through the problems. This is not to say that you won’t argue, but you will learn to “fight fair.” You also may move away from your partner for an hour or so, but you do this after communicating that you need to think things through and let your partner know when you will return. Most of the time when there is conflict in a relationship, it has to do with a misunderstanding or a resistance you have that is based on ego. Having accepting, loving partners that “hold the space” for each other to process feelings and thoughts, is how the relationship deepens and you grow into the couple you want to be.

Beyond the scope of this article is the question “what are the stages of an arranged marriage?” Having talked to a few men who are in arranged marriages, I found out that after the marriage, they did, in fact, fall in love with their wife and the couples are happy, committed and secure.

This article was previously published in Live Encounters Magazine. http://liveencounters.net/?page_id=6790

April’s Cardinal Cross: The Seasons of Our Lives In One Month

April 7, 2014 by @candesscampbell

Many people have been affected by the upcoming energy of the Grand Cross so I asked my astrologer to help us to understand what it means.

Enjoy this guest blog by Lee of Stillwaters Astro! http://stillwatersastro.com/ – Candess

Much has been discussed in recent months about the meaning and potential effects of April’s “Cardinal Grand Cross.” Just what does it mean to experience the combined effects of four planets each playing its own role in one of the four Cardinal signs forming a very close alignment in the shape of a cross in the same month?

The four Cardinal signs of the Tropical Zodiac are Aries, Cancer, Libra, and Capricorn that signify the beginning of the four seasons with the Sun’s annual arrival at zero degrees of longitude in each Cardinal sign. Cardinal signs can be described as “initiatory” corridors that usher in the official arrival of the Spring, Summer, Autumn, and Winter seasons each year.

Just as the seasons change with the arrival of Spring (birth), Summer (growth), Autumn (decline), and Winter (death), so do human lives in the course of each passing season and year.

The April 2014 Cardinal Grand Cross consists of a unique alignment of the planets Uranus in the sign of Aries, Jupiter in the sign of Cancer, Mars in the sign of Libra, and Pluto in the sign of Capricorn. These four planets form the symbol of a “Cross” within a single degree of an exact alignment that reaches its closest aspect during April 20th – 23rd. This Cardinal Grand Cross is further distinguished by its placement near the midpoint of two eclipses during the final two weeks of April.

The combined effects of so much focused celestial energy compressed within two weeks indicates completions and new beginnings both globally and individually as we experience the energies of all four seasons within a single month.

Stillwaters Astrology – April 2014

April 5th: Venus enters Pisces. The planet of beauty, love, and relationships joins Mercury, Chiron, and Neptune in the transcendent sign of Pisces bringing a welcome soothing quality to an otherwise intense month of April.

April 7th: Mercury enters Aries. The planet of communications picks up its pace as it departs sensitive Pisces and enters the aggressive fire sign of Aries. Mercury will receive an up close preview to report to us as it aspects the key Cardinal Grand Cross players of Jupiter, Uranus, Pluto, and Mars from April 14th – 16th. Those with planets or chart angles between 11 to 15 degrees in the Cardinal signs of Aries, Cancer, Libra, or Capricorn will be most affected by April’s Cardinal Grand Cross.

April 14th: Pluto retrogrades in Capricorn. The planet of transformation reverses direction on the eve of a Total Lunar Eclipse. As Pluto steps backwards in Capricorn for the first time since April 2013 it partners with Mars already in retrograde during next week’s Cardinal Grand Cross while Jupiter and Uranus maintain their course in direct forward motion.

April 15th: Full Moon in Libra/Aries Total Lunar Eclipse. Today’s Total Lunar Eclipse is analogous to the April 15th, 1995 Lunar Eclipse that preceded the catastrophic bombing of Oklahoma City, Oklahoma within four days on the morning of April 19th, 1995. Easter arrives this year on Sunday, April 20th, 2014, so it’s wise to be very conscious in activities with so many unpredictable collective dynamics during the second half of April.

April 19th: Sun enters Taurus. The Sun arrives in the earthy fixed sign of Taurus on the eve of Easter just in time to provide some ballast and grounding for the closest alignment of the initiatory Cardinal Grand Cross during the next four days.

April 23rd: Mercury enters Taurus. Just as the Cardinal Grand Cross completes its peak performance (including an exact 90 degree square aspect between Uranus and Pluto on April 21st), Mercury lends support to the Sun in Taurus by helping citizens of the global village return to terra firma and adjust to April’s celestial currents.

April 28th: New Moon in Taurus Solar Eclipse. April concludes with a Solar Eclipse in the earth sign of Taurus. After the transformational events of the past four weeks we now arrive at an opportune time to sow seeds for new beginnings.

Lee, founder of Stillwaters Astrology, is an intuitive astrologer of 23 years, providing expert astrology readings. Astrological services include natal charts, relationship compatibility through synastry and composite charts, personal life timing through transits, progressions, solar returns, and relocation astrology for changes in residence or travel. http://stillwatersastro.com/

Listen to What you Say

January 12, 2014 by @candesscampbell

Although I love social media, when using it, we often make connections that are more about quantity than quality. Hopefully, the relationships you create can meet your emotional needs as well as your other needs.

When you are actually in the presence of someone you can deepen the communication. Deepening relationships is important to emotional health. What happens is, when you let people get to know you, you begin to know yourself. When you hear yourself share, you hear yourself share!

When I taught my Intuitive Mastery Class yesterday, I heard myself say, “I don’t let many people work in my energy field. Not all healers are the same.” We were talking about Reiki and other forms of energy healing. As I thought about it later, I realized that I sounded judgmental and I decided to look at whether I was being judgmental, protective of my students, or both. What I could have said was, “when you study to become an energy healer or a Reiki practitioner, it is important you do the emotional work and learn to keep your energy field clean. Also, when receiving energy work, discern whether or not the energy healer is the best fit for you.” These statements would have been more positive. Listening to myself when teaching assisted me in taking inventory of my attitude and speaking in a clear, loving manner.

Another incidence was in conversation with a dear friend of mine. She asked me if I realized I said, “do you know what I mean?” over and over. I began listening for this and had a difficult time hearing it. When we Skyped for an hour one day, she pointed it out to me. I said it so many times it was nauseating! I began to listen to myself and hopefully have learned not to keep asking, “Do you know what I mean!”

Listen to yourself and share with me on my Facebook blog posts!

The Heart Chakra

January 6, 2014 by @candesscampbell

“One love, one heart, one destiny.” – Bob Marley

Writing about Love yesterday made me think about the heart chakra. When I was in my own heart, imaging those I love, I realized it was not my heart at all, but really the heart chakra that I focused on.

Many people are not aware of all the incredible information that is stored in the chakras. If you have ever had an intuitive reading from me, you know the power of this experience.

The heart chakra is about the Power of Love. It relates to love, self-love, love of others, love of God (or your own word for the Divine,) affinity, loneliness, commitment, forgiveness, hope and trust.

On my website I have listed detailed information about each of the chakras. Take some time to journal about the fourth chakra and see how you can bring balance into your relationships and into your life.

EnergyMedicineDNA

Most of all though, practice focusing on your loved ones in your heart and experiencing the incredible feeling of love! When you do this you heal your heart and theirs!

How to Choose a Psychic Healer

September 15, 2013 by @candesscampbell

Where ever you look today you see the words psychic, intuitive and healer. For those of us who have been providing these services for many years, it is so exciting that, once alienated and thought “weird,” we are now moving into the mainstream.

The downside of this though, is anyone can say they are a psychic, an intuitive and a healer. This whole subject is double edged for me. On one hand, I believe and teach that we are all intuitive and all have healing ability. The other side though, is that just because we are intuitive and have healing ability does not make us a psychic, an intuitive or a healer.

It is rare to find someone who immediately has these abilities or has the abilities without training and practice.

Kyoto- If I can lift the rock my wish comes true!

Today we have so many tools like tarot cards, medicine cards and such, and these are fun to use to get bits and pieces of information. To be a professional card reader though, to be in integrity and to charge for these readings, it can take years of practice.

[clickToTweet tweet=”How to Choose a Psychic Healer!” quote=”Integrity, Compassion and Healthy Boundaries are important traits of a Psychic Healer. “]

So how do you know who to trust and who is just putting out a self- proclaimed shield without backing? You have a right to know about the person you hire and who you let work in your energy field or read you psychically. If they don’t charge you, be even more careful because those of us who are highly skilled, usually charge.

Here are some guidelines.

Find out where they received their training. What school did they attend, what classes did they take, and are they certified? Do they have supervision? Most who are legitimate in these fields will be able to tell you, and proudly. Now, many of the spiritual healing and intuitive modalities are not accredited like medical schools or counseling programs, but the practitioner should be able to tell you where they learned their skills, what programs they took, or, with Reiki, the lineage of their teachers.
Have them share with you how long they have been doing this work. Their response to the question may be more important than how long they practiced. If they are not clear about this, that may be a red flag.
Make sure you work with someone who can be open and honest with you about what they do. If they cannot explain what they do, you may want to go to someone who has a definite skill and can back it up.
Find out if they get continuing education in their practice. The value of seeing professionals such as licensed counselors and physicians is they are required to have continuing education and stay up on what is happening in their field. See if your practitioner is doing the same. This includes a clear understanding of setting boundaries (their own and with clients) and the ethics of working with clients.

Whether you want to hire a psychic, an intuitive or a healer or you are a psychic, intuitive, or healer, it is important to know that not all people are trained and skilled appropriately. If you don’t trust the person you are seeing, find someone else. If you are uncertain about your own skills, get more training. You will feel better about yourself and attract more clients.

Here are a couple examples of why you want to make sure you are seeing the right person.

You want to receive a service from someone who understands more than you do about working with people. For instance, let’s say you are a person who believes everything you hear. You go to a psychic and she says you will lose your job in 3 months. You return to work and begin (subconsciously) to create the situation where you end up losing your job.

Now, if you are what we call highly programmable (believe everything you hear from the psychic) rather than discerning the information through your own filter, this can happen. A skilled psychic would be able to see this about you and speak with you in a way that you would receive the information you needed, but not leave her office and sabotage your job. An untrained psychic or intuitive may not understand programmability and may send you on your way to self-destruct.

It is important to see someone who does the emotional, mental, and spiritual work themselves. If not, they may have the tendency to “project” onto you some of what they are working on. An example from my own life is, when I was ill several years ago, unknowingly struggling with adrenal fatigue, I went to a local woman for a reading. She had two decks of cards. One had a border and then a cut out for another card and they together made one picture.

The outer border I picked was a picture of a barn. The inner picture was of a shovel. I was really ill, having no energy and could barely think at the time. She asked me to tell her what it meant. I couldn’t figure it out. She was impatient with me and said “it means your are supposed to pick up the shovel and get to work!” Well, not long afterward I was diagnosed with adrenal fatigue (which I write about in my book 12 Weeks to Self-Healing: Transforming Pain through Energy Medicine.) Shortly after that all I could do was rest. I could manage one client a day and that was it. Hindsight is, the card meant to put the shovel down and stop working, but the judgment I received from her was I was not doing enough. I also had felt I didn’t do enough which is why I had driven myself to such a physical state.

Had I known how to pick the right person to help me, the situation would have been much different. What happens though, is when we are at the bottom and reaching out for help, sometimes we just reach out anywhere. As you read this now, hoping your life is healthy and balanced, research the people you would choose for your psychic and your healer. Then when you need them, you will have confidence in your choice!

Curious about getting a Reading from Candess?

Save

How to Choose a Psychic Healer

September 15, 2013 by @candesscampbell

It is rare to find someone who immediately has these abilities or has the abilities without training and practice.

[singlepic id=53 w=320 h=240 float=]

Here are some guidelines.

1. Find out where they received their training. What school did they attend, what classes did they take, and are they certified? Do they have supervision? Most who are legitimate in these fields will be able to tell you, and proudly. Now, many of the spiritual healing and intuitive modalities are not accredited like medical schools or counseling programs, but the practitioner should be able to tell you where they learned their skills, what programs they took, or, with Reiki, the lineage of their teachers.

2. Have them share with you how long they have been doing this work. Their response to the question may be more important than how long they practiced. If they are not clear about this, that may be a red flag.

3. Make sure you work with someone who can be open and honest with you about what they do. If they cannot explain what they do, you may want to go to someone who has a definite skill and can back it up.

4. Find out if they get continuing education in their practice. The value of seeing professionals such as licensed counselors and physicians is they are required to have continuing education and stay up on what is happening in their field. See if your practitioner is doing the same. This includes a clear understanding of setting boundaries (their own and with clients) and the ethics of working with clients.

Here are a couple examples of why you want to make sure you are seeing the right person.

1. You want to receive a service from someone who understands more than you do about working with people. For instance, let’s say you are a person who believes everything you hear. You go to a psychic and she says you will lose your job in 3 months. You return to work and begin (subconsciously) to create the situation where you end up losing your job.

2. It is important to see someone who does the emotional, mental, and spiritual work themselves. If not, they may have the tendency to “project” onto you some of what they are working on. An example from my own life is, when I was ill several years ago, unknowingly struggling with adrenal fatigue, I went to a local woman for a reading. She had two decks of cards. One had a border and then a cut out for another card and they together made one picture.

How to Choose a Psychic Healer was originally published on Energy Medicine DNA