personal power

The Victim Archetype

September 24, 2014 by @candesscampbell

“The soul always knows what to do to heal itself.

The challenge is to silence the mind”

Previously I shared information about the Child Archetype and asked you to look at your relationship with others and integrate this information so you can see how you “show up” in relation to others. Today I will share about the Victim Archetype. The gift of the Victim Archetype is Self-Esteem.

According to the teachings of Caroline Myss there are 4 main archetypes we all share. They are the Child, Victim, Saboteur and Prostitute.

This information comes from information from Caroline Myss’ work in her Sacred Contracts book and the classes I took from her on Medical Intuition and Sacred Contracts. I have also added information that I have gained from working as a mental health counselor and chemical dependency professional for over 20 years.

In the process of self-healing, you have to come to terms with your victim self and move beyond this state of being. You can identify your victim, confront the behavior, love and forgive yourself and bring your energy into present time. In fact, unless you can bring at least 80% of your energy into present time, you will not have the power to self-heal. What do I mean by bringing yourself into present time? Watch your thoughts. Do you go off to the future (which can create anxiety) or drift off to the past (which can cause depression) or are you able to be present in the moment?

Enjoy exploring this archetype that can bring you high self-esteem once you embrace this part of yourself and move on!

Victim Archetype

Guardian of Self Esteem

Core issue is whether it is worth giving up your own sense of empowerment to avoid taking responsibility for your independence.

When you don’t stand up for yourself after awhile you no longer can tell the difference whether you are being victimized or not; so either you are being victimized and don’t know it or you are not being victimized, but act as if you are.

The victim archetype helps you decide what you will or will not do; a guardian of personal boundaries.
Lessons associated with the victim archetype demand that you evaluate your relationship to power, especially with people with whom you have control issues and have to set boundaries.
Primary objective is to develop self-esteem and personal power.
You have contracts with people whose primary purpose is to help you develop yourself-esteem through acts of honesty, integrity, courage, endurance and self-respect.
The victim will entice you to feel sorry for yourself.
You can act like a victim and give in or call upon your companions and guides for help.
Like the lion in the Wizard of Oz, you need to have the courage to look at your victim and make it your ally.
Do you victimize yourself in the way you interpret conversations with other people?
Does your victim alert you to protect yourself rather than letting people take advantage of you?
Does your victim motivate you to be shrewd in the dealings of whatever house it is in?
Does your empowered victim allow you to take risks in your life?
The victim urges us to act appropriately when we are in danger of being victimized.
The victim can alert us to being victimized through passivity and rash or inappropriate actions.
It can also alert us to how we victimize others for personal gain.
In shadow it may show how we play victim for sympathy or pity.

Join with me in delving into this Victim Archetype in your journal! Here is a helpful journal process.

Need help understanding your archetypes? Schedule an appointment!

The Victim Archetype

September 14, 2014 by @candesscampbell

“The soul always knows what to do to heal itself. The challenge is to silence the mind”
Caroline Myss
Yesterday I shared information about the Saboteur Archetype and asked you to journal about your own Saboteur. I committed to doing this myself to find out what was underneath my over-caffeinating behavior on the drive to Sisters, Oregon.
What an incredible experience it was. I sat at my friend…

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Listen before it’s Too Late!

January 8, 2014 by @candesscampbell

“Most people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply.”

― Stephen R. Covey, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People: Powerful Lessons in Personal Change

It is an enlightening view, sitting in my chair in my office as a mental health counselor. I am honored to sit with clients as they share about their lives and their relationships. In this process, I see themes unfold.

We have ended the year and are into the New Year. As I look ahead at new beginnings, it reminds me of one of the most common themes. When working with couples, I notice that, for most, by the time they enter my office, it’s too late.

Too often one of them attempted continually to communicate with the other, without being heard. Sadly, I watch their last attempt to keep the marriage together. The partner, let’s say the man, who has not really heard, but has listened as if she was nagging or on a rampage over something, finally understands. It is too late now for him to realize that what she was saying was important. So important, that the marriage is now over. I see him groveling and trying to make sense of it all. In the safety of another person (me) she says, “I’m sorry, but it is just too late.”

Many of us have ended relationships before the New Year. I remember myself, many years ago, sitting outside Nordstroms, having coffee with my lover on December 29^th. I said, “I am sorry, but it’s over.” This was difficult to say and it was painful. I had felt though, that what I said over and over, didn’t matter and I was “pushing the river,” in order to create a change for us. It didn’t work. Once I was honest and ended the relationship; although painful, it was also exhilarating.

When I am with clients and they are suffering over a relationship, I often ask, “when did you first know this was not the right situation for you?” More than I would like to hear, they say, “in the beginning.” If not, they knew years before they decided to make a change.

Whether it be a love relationship, a work relationship or a family situation, “when you begin to lose your voice, your self-esteem, your sense of personal power; it is time to make some kind of a shift.”